Happy Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Winter Solstice…Happy Everything!! I went up to the post office yesterday to mail out my Christmas cards and stolen goods (because they say the best things in life are free…that’s why I shop lift). And you know what I miss? They used to have a bulletin board at the post office with pictures of wanted felons. Now that bulletin board displays pictures of neighborhood people in the military, with a giant banner “Thanks for serving our country,” which is awesome, but I miss those pictures of wanted felons. That’s how I’d find old boyfriends. I’m told that the felon pictures are now displayed at Wal-Mart. Or maybe that’s the Employee of the Month bulletin board. I always get the two confused. The New Year is just a week away. And, like most people, I am considering my New Year resolutions. One of them is “No Lying.” Nah, that’s not even one of them…help me, I can’t stop! I’m actually still working on my list. But I do plan to put forth more effort to be a patient driver.

Lately, I find myself muttering the word “idiot” a lot when I am driving. No more of that business! And, I am going to learn to manage my time better, plan ahead for traffic and leave earlier. Basically, I will need to stop dawdling (or, as my friends call it, “Daun”dling). Time management alone will likely save me hundreds in toll bills, since I won’t be relying on costly express lanes to get me there on time. I don’t even have the stomach to look at how much I spent this year in tolls. After the holiday cheer ends, next comes tax season. I will wait until then to look at that expense. Why ruin my holiday spirit?

Until next week…

Daun Thompson
Writer / Comedienne / Artist

A Patient Driver – Comedy Defensive Driving