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Self-Driving Vehicle

My eight year old Niece was absolutely obsessed with the new Tesla showcased at the mall this weekend. When I told her that it is a self-driving vehicle, she looked at me like “you’re just messing with me, right?” The same look she gave me at her Grandfather’s funeral when I told her that Grandpa was in that little wooden box on the table next to his picture. Regardless, she said that she is putting this car on her “life goals” list (meaning her bucket list). It’s funny that an eight year old should already have a bucket list. I believe when I was her age, my greatest goal was marrying my Barbie to Ken. She and her six year old sister thought it was funny that the display car was plugged in and charging like a toy waiting to be played with. She asked why it even has a steering wheel if it drives itself, which is a fair question. The Tesla manufacturer claims that it has full self-driving capability at a safety level substantially greater than that of a human driver. All you need to do is get in the car and tell it where you want to go. It’s like a cab driver, only without the tip. If you don’t tell the car where to go, it will look at your calendar and take you to the assumed destination. It calculates the optimal route and navigates there. When you arrive at your destination, you simply get out and the car will enter “park seek mode” and automatically search a parking space and park itself. When you’re ready, a simple tap on your phone will summon the car back to pick you up. It’s kind of like the Lone Ranger’s horse, Trigger, only without the messy clean up. Cool, eh?

So, how does this work? Satellites, baby. Plus, there are eight surround cameras which provide 360 degrees of visibility around the car at up to 250 meters of range. Twelve updated ultrasonic sensors complement this vision, allowing for detection of both hard and soft objects at nearly twice the distance of the prior system. And, forward-facing radar with enhanced processing provides additional data about the world on a redundant wavelength that is able to see through heavy rain, fog, dust and even the car ahead. It’s all pretty amazing, if you really think about it. And, if an eight year old is impressed by a self-driving car, imagine how blown-away the older generation must be!

Until next week…
Daun Thompson
Writer / Comedienne / Artist

Self-Driving Vehicle – Comedy Defensive Driving

Daun Thompson: Daun Thompson has spent years acting in both film and theatre which has been paramount in launching her onto the comedy stage (incidentally, without a helmet, resulting in a nasty concussion). Being a funny girl is a full time job. A job that she hopes that one day will come with dental benefits and a 401K. Unlike her work, she is biodegradable, yet flame retardant. And gentle to the touch. Her goal in life??? For strangers to approach her and ask "Didn't you used to be somebody?" In the late 1980's she cut her teeth at the Velveeta Room on 6th Street in Austin, Texas ... the original room with the stripper pole. From there, she moved to northern California and worked with many comedy icons, like Mitch Hedberg, Marc Maron, Colin Quinn, Vic Dunlop, Huck Flyn, Michael Mancini, Doug Ferrari, Shang and Brian Posehn. Daun has been a licensed driver safety instructor and trainer with Comedy Defensive Driving for over 9 years. Her knowledge of driving safety laws keeps her readers informed and engaged with her blog adventures. She still continues to do stand-up comedy, sometimes in a reclining position...just to be different.