Freud said that most women tend to seek out a husband that reminds them of their own father. I suppose that I fit in that lower percent that does NOT. I’ve seen my dad in his underwear. And that’s something I can never un-see. Other experts say that most people choose a dog that looks like them. Perhaps I had better take another look in the mirror, then. Am I not seeing the mangy flea-bitten mutt that I really am? And, looks only take you so far in life, what about personality? Do people really choose a car that matches their personality? I once saw a guy in a beat up old Nova with a bumper sticker that read “My Other Car’s a Porsche.” Oh yea, right…and my 36D’s are in my other shirt! At least he has a sense of humor about what he drives. I’m sure the Nova wasn’t his ideal choice. I’d love to know what suits my own personality when choosing a car.

COMPARING CARS TO RELATIONSHIPS

My buddy Henri and I were just comparing cars to relationships. While we both agreed that we find the SAAB (especially the 80’s sporty models) super sexy and romantic, there are drawbacks to the exotics. Unlike a domestic vehicle, it is high maintenance and probably breaks down a lot (see the relationship similarities?). I mean, this is assuming you bought a used one, which we also both agreed that is what either of us could only afford. I did a quiz online and the car that was chosen to best suit my personality was a vintage baby blue VW beetle. Yep, just like a bad relationship, it will break down, run out of gas and make a lot of noise when sneaking into the garage late at night.

WHAT CAR BEST SUITS YOUR PERSONALITY

If I created my own car personality test (to see what car best suits your personality) here are a few of the questions I would ask someone as to how they describe themselves:
• Is your age range between 45-64? (a.k.a. Mid-life crisis years)
• Do Corvettes give you goose bumps or hives? (Another mid-life crisis trigger)
• How would a first date describe you? (Fast, Spendthrift and Carefree or Slow, Cheap and Safe)
• How are you with money? (Again, cheapskate or spendthrift … just double-checking)
• What is your favorite movie genre? (Horror, comedy, boring home movies of your kids)
• How do you describe your style? (Chanel, Burberry, Marshall’s or TJMaxx)

So, you may want to trade that jacked-up, sticky Brady Bunch mini-van for a mid-life crisis red Corvette. That’s what I will likely need to do, as I doubt I can even touch a vintage VW Beetle within my budget.

Until next week…
Daun Thompson
Writer / Comedienne / Artist

CHOOSING A CAR – Comedy Defensive Driving